I reckon losing control of my past behaviour that may not give me the quality of life that I want yet, stubbornly I still cling on to it. That seems irrational and does not make sense yet that is what I do So I need proper intervention and stay constantly aware of what I need to do to avoid losing balance and stay out of track.
Some research say we need 30 -66 days to adopt a new habit. I am probably one third in the journey and already have withdrawal symptoms and begin hallucinate and have buyer's remorse. Why am I doing this ?
I need to calm down, breathe and see the bigger picture, feel deeper into the purpose behind doing this project. WHY am I doing it? If this wish is fulfilled, how will I feel? It may seems distant and difficult to incite feelings of achievement, excitement or achievement when where I am now to where I am going seems far (geographically). The trick is in the mind and to bring the end goal to the present by enacting the scene as vividly as possible. Mind you, this is not a one off event but a daily one which builds on the last foundation and keep on building it mentally. No wonder so many people give up as it seems surreal and impossible to achieve as they can't "see" it to believe it.
The truth is we need to first believe it in our mind , see it in our mind and it will be manifested in our external world. How exactly it is done will require time, intensity of focus on this singular activity and strong faith. As the faith becomes stronger, naturally we will know what actions to take that will lead to positive consequences that take us closer to our goal. The starting point is not finding the means to an end but live in the end literally.
Allow God to take over and lose control by relinquish human efforts to pursue our goals. The more we try to control the more stress we become and the journey without God is often fraught with ups and downs. With God's grace, it might be slower but we will find it a blessing and joy in the journey towards pursuing our goal. Doors are open, opportunities are given and it seems effortless and ideas that you never think of will appear miraculously. That is the power and what God can do in our lives IF we allow him.
Surrender to God is not an act of cowardice or what others perceived as being lazy or shirking from one's responsibilities. On the contrary, it is wisdom and working smart than working hard to get what we want. Testimonials from others can do so much to motivate us but we must eventually get on this journey ourselves. Letting go may seems a challenge for many as we are so used to doing it for such a long time. We feel vulnerable, uncertain and fearful what lies ahead and have doubts, questions, anxiety,etc. What if .....what if .......
Learning to trust God and allowing him to take over my life is the best decision I had ever make in my life. It is , to me not a one off activity but one that requires daily renewal of the mind, consciously aware the role and importance he plays in my life and my family and being humbled by his grace towards us.